December 18th, 2008

ATU :: Earth Clois

A Lesson in Futility


Dear Opener of Packaging,

This time of year it's pretty stressful to be working retail in the first place. It only amps it up and makes me want to throttle someone more when someone takes it upon themselves to open the packaging on items that are constructed to only to have said packaging opened once. Once you open it, I have to damage it out because it's obvious that it's been trifled with. It only frays the nerves further when it is something that has nothing to do with Christmas, like toothpaste. And it's not as if we haven't been been doing this dance every day for the last month or so. I so look forward to meeting you someday.

No love,
Me

Dear Purloiners of Low-Grade Cosmetics,

Yes, I am quite aware that there are more than one of you. While we welcome all customers that enter our store, we do discourage any 'sticky fingers' on our shelves and suggust that you washed your hands of your recent activities. It is quite unpleasant to be forced to spend the majority of your evening ringing gifts outside your department, only to return to find plastic security molds and UPCs randomly left on the shelves. Then again, it's on your conscience and my security camera. Have a happy holiday and I'll see you in the new year. Wear something festive when we send the car for you.

No love,
Me

P.S. If you feel the need to continue your current career, please do decide to upgrade your tastes in cosmetics. We'd respect you more if you showed your refinement.

Most Beloved Last-Minute Shoppers,

While I do understand your dilemma perfectly (I still have several gifts to purchase myself), please take into consideration that there are been four flyers sent out in the last four weeks. Items that were marked as limited time only in the Black Friday sales-blast are likely out-of-stock now. Some items are only purchased by the company at Christmas, and as such, the stock is limited. There are items that are capable of being reordered, and we are doing so, yet some were a one-time-only deal. I feel for you, really, I do. I wanted one of the 20s Flapper Jewelry Dolls myself. But having a hysterical breakdown on a new employee is not the way to receive the service, or item, that you want. Neither is demanding a raincheck (which we cannot do and have never done). This is the Christmas season; in the last week before Christmas, items sell out. We have no control over this. While we apologize for being out of the Coleman  fishing pen, it is best to do your shopping in a timely manner. As Uncle Buford's 'dream gift' is not available, might I suggest a gift card in the same amount so that he might choose a substitute after we restock? 

Please enjoy the rest of the season with your family.

A Little Love,
Me

...

...

Okay, the season is finally getting to me. We're working fairly busy nights with a skeleton crew. At Christmas. They cut our hours for the rest of the month due to 'lack of business'. Right. *sigh* I want to call out sick today so bad, but I'm only working four days this week. I'd say I'll be glad to see Christmas over, but I really don't want to see what hours look like in January.